oct 18

I am so sad.

I feel as if all the joy has been sucked out of me.

I knew what/who Invisible Children was before I went tonight, I knew the horrific things. I knew that I would cry. I knew it would be hard.

but I am so sad.

I can't do anything. I don't have much money. I don't know what else to do to help them. To help the children abducted by the LRA in Africa, to help the children all over the world trafficked in the sex trade, to help, to help, to help.

I need to scream and yell. but if I did here, people would worry. I need someplace abandoned. It's not going to happen. So I pace instead. In my room, back and forth, until I am dizzy. I don't know what to do. I don't want to be alone.

so sad.

If J were not in England, I would ask if I could do my math homework in her room, or apartment just so I would not have to be alone. and she would understand.

and when you think about one sad thing, they all seem to bubble up. they all want a piece of your sadness. all the sad things happening to children. all the things troubling me.

bubble

bubble

bubble

there is always hope.

I do not want to wallow.

I also do not want to brush this aside. I do not want to forget them.

please.