june 4

Some days the words just spew and my heart remembers that it loves you.

I think there is an adolescent blue bird on the roof outside my window, hopping around loudly. I like it.

I took a walk this morning in the fresh blue morning air because my heart needed it. Always does, I think, but today my mind agreed.  And as I walked I remembered why quiet walks with J are so good. Because when I let myself just be as I am supposed to, little young me taking a walk down my street staring at the sky, I can remember that I am God’s child, and that is my identity, and that is all I need. When I let my heart just swell with love I remember that God is all I want. Just to be with him.

And standing here at my kitchen window staring out at these adolescent blue birds being just as they were purposed to be and staring at the sky, it just awes me. A blue sky will never cease to amaze me, and it shouldn’t. Staring at that blue snaps me out of my entitlement and brings me into grace.

Even the wind and waves obey Him. I have no reason to be anxious.

When I take myself out of the busyness, when I close the computer and turn off the music and go outside, I get to enter into something so rich. To step on the ground that no hand even had a part in creating…

In suburban Ohio, or the Himalayas, His hand is the same. His heart is the same. He is the same.

The blue sky captures my eyes with splendor. The grey sky reminds my eyes that the ground is beautiful too.

(before the throne)

....later....

This morning was totally great. Walking, painting, drinking water. And then my heart went askew and the day went down hill. 

and then M said she wanted to skype. Skype wasn't working so I took my phone outside (no service in) and I walked around in the beautiful night- full, GORGEOUS moon and the stars and wispy clouds and we had suuuuuch a good talk and my day brightened. 

and then A and A were being amazing on facebook. not as good as real life but it was still life-giving. and beautiful.

goodnight.