I'm bored outta my gourd. I can't spend one more night just sitting around the house. I used to be busy 5/7 nights a week and it was GLORIOUS.

somehow, I got to where I was going.

Beautiful, Urgent Christmas

More and more I am noticing the urgency, the beauty, and the seriousness of Christmas.

As a child, Christmas was exciting because it seemed that in the month before Christmas, the world (or rather my small sample of it) became cheerful. I loved the music and decorations (still do) and all of the festivities. And then there was a lull, as I grew and saw that the world didn’t actually brighten up for the season but simply pretended to. This was disappointing and I wondered if I would ever return to the child-like wonder. But I’ve learned that Christmas is more than a joyful celebration (though it is also that). Christmas is a rescue mission. Christmas is dangerous. There is an urgency to Christmas that the world doesn’t understand.

Christmas carols are both somber and joyful, songs of real hope, not simply a bandage to fill December with false joy but a hope to fill the whole year, because Jesus came to rescue us and He’ll come again! Because a new, sovereign King has come, because the slave is our brother! Because in His name all oppression will stop! Because God is with us! Because the God of the universe took the humble way in, because we do not have to buy our way to Him, because He loves us and whatever we want to offer Him, because He came to save us when we’d gone astray, because the prophets’ words have come true!

Now that is some seriously good stuff! We have watered Christmas down to fairy tales, giving gifts, reindeer and bright lights. These are all wonderful things and great ways to enjoy and celebrate the season, but the actual message of Christmas is far more powerful, far more joyful.

Oh, I want the world to know that I sing and dance and clap because the King has come! The rescue has arrived! The dark world we live in has nothing on Him! Darkness is light to Him!

It is truly a joyous season, because

“The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light.

For those who lived in a land of deep shadows— light! sunbursts of light!”

“For a child has been born—for us! The gift of a son—for us! He’ll take over the running of the world. His names will be: 
Amazing Counselor,

Strong God,

Eternal Father,

Prince of Wholeness.

His ruling authority will grow, and there’ll be no limits to the wholeness he brings. He’ll rule from the historic David throne over that promised kingdom. He’ll put that kingdom on a firm footing and keep it going with fair dealing and right living, beginning now and lasting always. The zeal of God-of-the-Angel-Armies will do all this.”

(from Isaiah 9, The Message)

For me, Christmas has many flavors.

I taste sorrow and darkness of the world, the unknowing.

I taste excitement and anticipation for the first time Jesus came to us and for when Jesus will return.

I taste urgency, that all people will know Him and have a love relationship with Him.

I taste joy, because the Light has won!

So when January comes, I will still be singing joy. Joy to the world, the King has come! Let earth receive her King, every season, every day!

How do you measure the transit of people?

Some Thoughts, Because That's What Blogs Are For

I didn't know my spirit was adventurous until college, but now that I know, it is hard to stay.
      I couldn't see the sunset well tonight, though I knew it was brilliant, orange like fire and pink like bubblegum, and that made me restless.
      Yesterday's strong wind made my soul ache for mountains of firs, pines, the evergreens.
      I tell myself, you shouldn't be restless. you just went. But it isn't something I can stop. Every taste of independence and adventure leaves me wanting for more.

I grew up across the river from a shooting range. The sound of gunshots always felt like home, especially at night. After I went away and met refugees, after I learned of riots and wars, I think twice when I hear them. Not out of fear, but out of wonder. How the sound of controlled gunshots is sweet to my ears, and for many others it is a sound of trauma.

My mother said to me tonight, as she washed the dishes and I dried, Maybe you're lonely here. I am lonely here, though it's not the painful lonely I've experienced many times. It is more a knowledge that I have three friends in this city. Most of the people I would call to talk about life live far, far away. I am lonely for fun, I am lonely for adventure. I am lonely to be doing things. Like George Bailey, I wanna shake the dust off this town and see the world. Only, it's less about seeing the world, and more about DOING SOMETHING.

waiting. 

And then I mentioned that I am HAVING PMS, I said it rather loud because it makes my father uncomfortable, and I rather like making him uncomfortable when I am in this mood. I would think after three daughters and a wife it would be old hat. But it's not, apparently. And that annoys me.

there are pockets of time after tragic events
when this nation of comfort-worshippers wakes up
for a time.
like now, we watch riots on the news and our hearts ache,
for a bit.

A long paragraph with no break. ha! sorry!

I was in Panera today and I overheard three mamas talking about their kids. They were talking about the technology struggle, how their children only wanted to play video games and watch netflix. How their children wanted laptops and ipads for Christmas. I couldn't tell how old their kids were, but they didn't sound old enough to need laptops. Anyway, it doesn't matter. That's not the point. The point is that my family barely even had a computer when I was growing up. (Macintosh, black and white. Sometimes we played duck hunter or the Oregon trail :) ) I was only allowed to watch PBS, and there were time limits. But I realize that now, I know a lot about certain things. I read books upon books upon books about dogs. "Boring," full of words books. I read them, cover to cover. I studied animals and I watched the squirrel family outside, I took notes about their behavior. I studied things. The TV shows I watched were truly educational. And now, I have a decent amount of knowledge about dogs and other animals. I don't credit that to school. I credit that to the reality that my life wasn't swallowed by technology.