Significance

I have a friend named Beezy. (Not her real name, but it works well for a blog.) Tomorrow, she embarks on a yearlong journey of life in the city of brotherly love. I’m beyond excited for her. I think she’s brilliant for doing this instead of something “traditional” right out of college. (Me, I’m sitting in my bedroom licking envelopes and stamping stamps. But that’s beside the point.) Anyway, I’m excited for her. She knows this. However, I didn’t start this blog post to talk about my excitement. I started it to talk about the significance of her leaving.

A few things rushed into my mind when we said goodbye and I hung up the phone this morning.

The first was, HERE WE GO. Graduating college was a significant transition. Leaving a life of independence in my college town and moving back home with my parents was certainly a significant transition. There were other things too: milestones of driving, a friend getting married… And now, Beezy leaves for the beginning of her mission, her sending, her journey, and I stay for the beginning of mine. Here we go, because she is, in my mind, basically going to another country, not because of the distance, but because of the limited communication and drastically different experiences. Here we go, because we have begun. I’m staying back home to raise money, but it is nonetheless part of the mission, the sending, the journey. Here we go, because we have chosen the hard, narrow, slippery road, and here it is before us. We have chosen the hard places. We’ve chosen the challenge.

and Here we go, because though I dearly want to see her before I move to Rome, there is a possibility that I could leave before she gets back. Though the mountain to get there seems far too large to reach the top by my goal of next summer, it is a possibility.

I guess what I’m trying to say, is that my chum is leaving. I’m excited for her, but more than that I am keenly aware of the significance of her leaving. She’s going, and I’m preparing, and then I’m going to go too. And that’s significant.

Hap Hap Happy!

In typical Phoebe phasion, I need to go to bed. But suddenly my joy is too bubbling for that!!

So, some ramblings, perhaps?

Today I went to the grocery store (because I go there every day- I'm serious) to buy asparagus (because I forgot them), eggs, and yogurt. I went through u-scan and I took. my. time. It drives me bonkers that people are in such a rush! The woman in line behind me actually took a few steps in my direction, instead of patiently waiting at the beginning of the line. So she was sort of crowding me. I mean, I still had plenty of space, but she was crowding me with her rush. So I looked over my receipt a few times, slowly gathered my bags, slowly picked up the basket, slowly walked away. I think part of u-scan is that one shouldn't have to rush. I could have stayed there for hours if I had wanted to. I wish people could just take a breath and realize that going to the grocery store might take a few minutes.

Later, I drew Peebs and Geebs comics on the deck while the evening sun lingered, and then I received some great encouragement, and made some super fun plans.

My day was productive and is ending with joy.

Italian, skyping my pal, Kim, working on support letters. I ran out of stamps! :)
Plans with Asheebs, lovin' Geebs and Beebs, sunshine and waitin' for fall.

God is giving me people and things to fill my time.

Favorite things of evenings

taking my hair down after it has been up all day, and it is soft and smells light, holding soft waves.

walking into my room (in the summer) after it has been closed up all day, smelling the old, and opening the window to let in the night air.

the warm glow from a lamp.

finding boots, "good quality but wrong color for me" from my mother sitting on my bedroom floor. WHY YES, I will most certainly take them off your hands! I don't know enough about fashion to know if they are my color or not, to me they look simply brown, and elegant-- oh, I cannot wait for fall.

Palz

I have this pal, her name is Ashley.

Tonight, she invited me to have a beverage, and watch the storm roll in. Well, the storm had passed but the sky was gorgeously blue as the sun began to set against the woods next to the house. We sat on the porch with our hard cider. We watched the sky, the trees, the two deer across the road, the hawk sitting on the flower fence. We talked about Jesus and women's ministries. And it was a rich conversation. A rich time.

I'm so thankful that she's been here this past month. Sometimes I'm not the most affectionate person (sometimes I am), but I'm so thankful she's stuck with me through my transition and hers. She's a pal, a gem, a sisterfriend for sure.

:)

Towels

Tonight I stood in the shower and washed three days worth of grime out of my scalp. Unfortunately for me, that is a lot of grime. It felt good. And then I saw that my mother had bought new towels. HAPPINESS. And then I saw the label.

100% COTTON

MADE IN PAKISTAN

cotton

SUPPLIER 760348 RN#93677

jcp home

I am sure this will sound hypocritical to you. I am a hypocrite, after all. When see tags and labels that read "MADE IN THAILAND" "MADE IN INDONESIA" "MADE IN NEPAL" etc,  I think about the working and living conditions of the people who have made these items. But it doesn't hit me like this did. It is because I know people from Pakistan. I've got a connection to that place that I don't have to Thailand or Malaysia or Mali. Tonight I stopped and asked God to bless the man or woman who made the towel I use out of luxury. I feel bad that every label does not stop me this way. I wonder how my life would change, if truly, no one was invisible. Not even the man or woman who made my towel. I think my life would be much slower.

A quick google search of "Pakistan textile industry" leads me to a company, a city name: Karachi. It is a big city in Pakistan and I am sure there are textile workers all over the country. But it gives me an idea. The world continues to shrink.

The sky!

The world is not yours to police.

Stop with the judgmental rants.
Stop with the "my side is right always."

My friend JUST send me this beautiful text message:

"Oh Phoebe! The sky is the most perfect blue with white clouds, sunshine and a breeze, and I wish that my phone took better pictures so that I could share it with you! :) "

The world, my friends, is not for you to police.
But the SKY IS for you to admire!

WARM

I'm breathing warm air.
I'm loving the heat.
I'm listening to a cathedral of crickets.
I'm remembering to reflect.
I'm stretching.
I'm sitting on a star watching the ocean.
I'm holding time in my ears.
I'm speaking insignificance.
I'm speaking secrets.
I'm laughing.