Palz

I have this pal, her name is Ashley.

Tonight, she invited me to have a beverage, and watch the storm roll in. Well, the storm had passed but the sky was gorgeously blue as the sun began to set against the woods next to the house. We sat on the porch with our hard cider. We watched the sky, the trees, the two deer across the road, the hawk sitting on the flower fence. We talked about Jesus and women's ministries. And it was a rich conversation. A rich time.

I'm so thankful that she's been here this past month. Sometimes I'm not the most affectionate person (sometimes I am), but I'm so thankful she's stuck with me through my transition and hers. She's a pal, a gem, a sisterfriend for sure.

:)

Towels

Tonight I stood in the shower and washed three days worth of grime out of my scalp. Unfortunately for me, that is a lot of grime. It felt good. And then I saw that my mother had bought new towels. HAPPINESS. And then I saw the label.

100% COTTON

MADE IN PAKISTAN

cotton

SUPPLIER 760348 RN#93677

jcp home

I am sure this will sound hypocritical to you. I am a hypocrite, after all. When see tags and labels that read "MADE IN THAILAND" "MADE IN INDONESIA" "MADE IN NEPAL" etc,  I think about the working and living conditions of the people who have made these items. But it doesn't hit me like this did. It is because I know people from Pakistan. I've got a connection to that place that I don't have to Thailand or Malaysia or Mali. Tonight I stopped and asked God to bless the man or woman who made the towel I use out of luxury. I feel bad that every label does not stop me this way. I wonder how my life would change, if truly, no one was invisible. Not even the man or woman who made my towel. I think my life would be much slower.

A quick google search of "Pakistan textile industry" leads me to a company, a city name: Karachi. It is a big city in Pakistan and I am sure there are textile workers all over the country. But it gives me an idea. The world continues to shrink.

The sky!

The world is not yours to police.

Stop with the judgmental rants.
Stop with the "my side is right always."

My friend JUST send me this beautiful text message:

"Oh Phoebe! The sky is the most perfect blue with white clouds, sunshine and a breeze, and I wish that my phone took better pictures so that I could share it with you! :) "

The world, my friends, is not for you to police.
But the SKY IS for you to admire!

WARM

I'm breathing warm air.
I'm loving the heat.
I'm listening to a cathedral of crickets.
I'm remembering to reflect.
I'm stretching.
I'm sitting on a star watching the ocean.
I'm holding time in my ears.
I'm speaking insignificance.
I'm speaking secrets.
I'm laughing.

thought.

{watching the Voyage of the Dawn Treader trailer}

How is it that a movie trailer and make my soul jump, but my own life does not? Is it that I am used to the sort of daily adventure I live, or is it because I am blind to it? Is it the fantastical, past paced adventure? But then, isn't the life Jesus gives me even more fantastical?

every delicacy

Today is the sort of day that belongs in a poem. It is August fifteenth, and for much of the day I wore a sweater and my slippers. I believe it got up to 79 degrees F, but low humidity, a nice breeze, and plenty of shade.

Jared made our last dinner of summer (at least, together as a family). By five o’clock the house and yard smelled of ingredients on the grill: smoking eggplant and lamb, olive oil and za’atar. The sky was sharp blue—I could stare at it for hours. I blew bubbles at my nieces and we sat on a blanket breathing in the smells of the Middle East right here in our backyard. I picked flowers for the centerpiece- they’re wedding flowers that didn’t bloom in time, but they look pretty now!

And when it was time to eat, we sat down to a full table of (all homemade) water with mint leaves (from a neighbor’s garden) and lemon, baba ghanoush, hummus, lamb kebabs, salad, and flatbread. A feast. I felt as though we could have back been in Syria.

and one of Syria, because I love to remember.

What is next?

“What’s next?”

You all want to know, and it’s completely understandable. I’ve given little details here and there, but it’s overwhelming for me to try and write it out. I’ve written a support letter, asking for support, but I’m not sure how to write a blog about it without it sounding awfully dry and boring.

What’s next? Well first, I should tell you that I graduated in December 2013 with my BA in Psychology with a minor in creative writing (poetry). I stayed in Bowling Green (Ohio) until the middle of June. (I worked as the baker at Tim Horton’s.)

I am going to move to Rome, Italy with International Teams for two years.

How did I pick International Teams and who are they? In the summers of 2012 and 2013, I went to Hungary with a different organization to teach English in refugee camps. It was the hardest thing I’d ever done and it fit my soul. The summers were incredibly different experiences, which showed me that I was actually interested in refugee work, not just attached to one place.

I learned a lot about people, God, myself during those two summers. One thing I noticed was that it seemed like the countries receiving refugees didn’t seem to want to receive their stories. They’re invisible in a lot of places, or at least, they’re not seen.

I was drawn to ITeams in part because of the value that no one is invisible. Another thing I love about ITeams is the goal that everyone would have access to food, freedom, and forgiveness. ITeams’ vision is to see lives and communities transformed by the power of God, doing this by bringing people together to help the oppressed.

Originally I talked with ITeams about writing for the organization, but after going back to the refugee camp another summer, I realized I wanted to be with the people. So after almost two years of talking, interviewing, personality assessments, psychological assessments, skype calls, and an endless amount of emailing, I was accepted to go to Rome for two years, to work with refugees and whoever else God has us interacting with there.

I know a little bit about the ministry in Rome, but I don’t really know what my day-to-day life will look like. I’m okay with this, because I am one hundred percent sure God knows what He’s doing there, but it’s a bit unsatisfying to have to say I don’t know whenever I’m asked.

What I do know is that social support for refugees in Italy is pretty bad. I know that there is a refugee center that the ITeams team currently runs, and that my team wants to fill as many needs in our community as we can. Whatever the needs are there, that’s what we’ll focus on. I know that we want to pass the ministry off to the Italian church, and that we don’t want to be an umbrella organization, but rather working with and alongside our neighbors in the community.

What does the timeline look like? I need to learn Italian. ITeams has a program for me to go through for that. I need to take a confirmation trip to Rome, to make sure it’s where God wants me. I need to attend training, online and in real life. And of course, I need to raise a lot of money. I’m aiming to leave next summer, but it’s not a deadline and only God knows how long it will take.

I’ll need about 36,000 dollars a year, and I need to have all my money for two years pledged before I can leave. It’s $3,000 a month, which is incredibly reasonable for Europe. The total includes all the fun stuff like taxes and insurance.

That’s what I’ve got for you right now. It definitely has not sunk in that I will Rome will be home, at least for a season.

A few things:

I’ll be sending update emails- please let me know (and give me your email address) if you want to receive those!

If you want to receive a packet of information I will gladly send you one!

I need a prayer team. I’m thinking I’ll send special prayer email updates to just the people who want to pray for me regularly. So let me know if you’re interested in that as well!

Finally, if you feel led to support me financially here and now, that would be a huge gift to me! You can donate online https://wwws.iteams.org/us/giving-form and stick my name (Phoebe Lawry) in the box.

I’d love to hear from you! What’s going on in your life? What are you learning? How can I be praying for you? Please comment or email me! 

Thanks for sticking with me through this long post, friends! (I promise most of my blog posts will be more fun!)