Last night, I sat on
the concrete ledge around a no longer flowing fountain. I was talking on the
phone to my sisterfriend. I was talking about hard, meaningful things. And then
a man drove by in his blue car and yelled something to me out the window. I didn’t
hear exactly, but I think it was “what are you doing tonight?” Sir, I was
wearing a raincoat, talking to my friend. What does it look like I’m doing
tonight?
And then I walked
home. I like walking in the shadows because no one can really see me, but as my
eyes are adjusted, I can see others. As I was walking, a street light came on
when I walked under it. It was annoying to me, because I like not being able to
be seen. When I walk down brightly lit streets I am just as likely to be yelled
at as when the street is dark.
The men who are
disrespectful will be just as disrespectful in the daylight as they will be at
night. The man who wants to yell from his car will yell regardless of whether I
am walking in a well lit place or not. It is “harmless,” after all, yelling
from his car, he thinks. So I would rather not be seen. I would rather walk in
my dark clothes through the shadows that are dark at night, than walk through a
well-lit parking lot.
“The parking lot is
well-lit,” she said, the real estate agent, trying to convince my friend to
rent the apartment. Well, that’s fine and dandy trying to get groceries out of
the car or unbuckling a seatbelt, but simply walking? Eh, my favorite sort of
walking is done in woods, not so many streetlights there.
Oy. I’d just rather not be yelled at when I’m walking, no matter the hour of the day, no matter where I am, okay? cool.
