If you will listen, I want to spill my reasons for happiness.
today is my birthday, which adds greatly to my happiness but is not the biggest reason for it.
God is doing things. Great, beautiful, joyous things.
I have been super giggling. A God thing, for sure. I've been listening to "galaxies" by Owl City quite a lot and each time it practically sends me into giggles.
had lunch with some great friends.
getting to catch up with tons of people on facebook.
My mom sent the seaweed candies that I forgot to bring with me, and they got here just in time to share them!
phone calls from good friends.
GOD IS DOING THINGS!!
1/16/12
1/15/12
wonder
The daily reading at ransomed heart ministries this morning is about wonder. https://www.ransomedheart.com/?q=node/748
The incourage post for yesterday is about feeling like what we love doesn't matter. http://www.incourage.me/2012/01/when-you-feel-like-it-doesnt-matter.html
It has a link to another post about things we're perhaps made for, even if they sound ridiculous when we compare them to our culture or the other amazing people around us. http://www.sbryant.me/2011/11/10/ridiculous/
lots of links. sorry. :) In my head they all go together.
Getting to a place where your mouth does not even hold words to describe, only your heart can speak. Yesterday morning I walked in the cemetery in the middle of campus. It was quiet, and snowing, beautiful. bird chirps, pine branches rustling. windy. lovely.
Being made for wonder. How beautiful those snowflakes are. spinning. perfection.
Knowing that on my own I am a gross, broken mess. But I am loved more than the sunrise, and through Jesus, I am beautiful. Sometimes that escapes my heart, and sometimes it hits so delightfully hard.
like the lyrics of "Extraordinary" by Jenn Weber. "Somedays I feel I'm not capable, there's always someone more qualified. What can average accomplish anyway? I feel like I can't get it right. But oh, what I find to be true all the time is You. You see what we are but You graciously use us and let us take part. And You, You call simple hearts to be extraordinary."
It goes together to me, because my heart is drawn towards spinning in the snow and sunrises. The simple, joyful things. The things children notice. Sometimes it feels silly, being so enraptured by the sky and the sound of grass rustling. But perhaps, that is how I was made. Perhaps my impossible passions and childlike delights are glorious.
Awake!
The incourage post for yesterday is about feeling like what we love doesn't matter. http://www.incourage.me/2012/01/when-you-feel-like-it-doesnt-matter.html
It has a link to another post about things we're perhaps made for, even if they sound ridiculous when we compare them to our culture or the other amazing people around us. http://www.sbryant.me/2011/11/10/ridiculous/
lots of links. sorry. :) In my head they all go together.
Getting to a place where your mouth does not even hold words to describe, only your heart can speak. Yesterday morning I walked in the cemetery in the middle of campus. It was quiet, and snowing, beautiful. bird chirps, pine branches rustling. windy. lovely.
Being made for wonder. How beautiful those snowflakes are. spinning. perfection.
Knowing that on my own I am a gross, broken mess. But I am loved more than the sunrise, and through Jesus, I am beautiful. Sometimes that escapes my heart, and sometimes it hits so delightfully hard.
like the lyrics of "Extraordinary" by Jenn Weber. "Somedays I feel I'm not capable, there's always someone more qualified. What can average accomplish anyway? I feel like I can't get it right. But oh, what I find to be true all the time is You. You see what we are but You graciously use us and let us take part. And You, You call simple hearts to be extraordinary."
It goes together to me, because my heart is drawn towards spinning in the snow and sunrises. The simple, joyful things. The things children notice. Sometimes it feels silly, being so enraptured by the sky and the sound of grass rustling. But perhaps, that is how I was made. Perhaps my impossible passions and childlike delights are glorious.
Awake!
1/13/12
Awake
Five Minute Friday! I haven't done a five minute friday in so long! But I'm back! Here's the deal: write for five minutes, on one word. Don't edit. Don't worry. Today's word is awake.
go.
I was hoping for something that might show me what to do. I'm trying to make a decision, a commitment or not a commitment. I don't know what God wants me to do.
Snow is my most favorite. Add some icey chunks whipping into my face and I'm in bliss. No joke. I adore snow. I love natural things that show me I am alive. Truly alive, feeling everything. I love the prick of ice on my face. These blustery winter days remind me of who I am. What I was made for.
Awake. I feel awake, alive, and most of all, loved. (too many commas? too bad :) ) Whistling wind reminds me of God. Of being awake. Aware, alert, my whole soul open to the joy of winter.
I need to learn to listen. To wake up when I am warm, safe. To not lull back to sleepiness. Active listening, awake listening, so I can hear what He wants me to do.
I don't know what to do, but snow is my most favorite.
go.
I was hoping for something that might show me what to do. I'm trying to make a decision, a commitment or not a commitment. I don't know what God wants me to do.
Snow is my most favorite. Add some icey chunks whipping into my face and I'm in bliss. No joke. I adore snow. I love natural things that show me I am alive. Truly alive, feeling everything. I love the prick of ice on my face. These blustery winter days remind me of who I am. What I was made for.
Awake. I feel awake, alive, and most of all, loved. (too many commas? too bad :) ) Whistling wind reminds me of God. Of being awake. Aware, alert, my whole soul open to the joy of winter.
I need to learn to listen. To wake up when I am warm, safe. To not lull back to sleepiness. Active listening, awake listening, so I can hear what He wants me to do.
I don't know what to do, but snow is my most favorite.
1/7/12
The ground is hardening again after the long rain
and I feel stable enough
to run, hard and fast, cold air burning my chest,
with the dog just ahead,
stolen roses in my hands.
They are candy-cane striped, disgustingly pink and heavy
on their woody stems.
I’ll put them in water, in a jelly jar,
place it on the countertop for you. Darling.
If I had nothing else to say, then this
could be enough. If I woke tomorrow, I mean,
and couldn’t speak.
My flushed cheeks, brilliant with the shock
of winter sun, my flashing black boots, their weeks-old mud
flaking off with each stride, my breath,
the joy, no rain —
would be enough.
Katie Cappello
saturday
I feel like an old woman. old soul. A Hazel. I think about the old days and sit in the sun with my eyes closed. I cheer on the little boys playing with sticks in the woods. I love it when the floor creaks and listening to geese and when my mind is made up, it is made up.
I feel so young. I wear pink because it is pretty. I wear things that do not go together because I like the colors. I love to spin, and skip, and twirl around with my arms above my head. I like dancing with the boys and walking steep hills in the woods. I delight in mornings, but am too lazy to get out of bed. And when my mind is made up, it is made up.
----
I would like to bring you here. Set you loose and just let you be. I want to say, look here, isn't the sky so blue? I want to say, walk here, how do the stones feel under your feet? I want to say, listen, do you hear the geese? I want to say, can you hear the plane? Do you feel safe in these woods? and then link arms with you and we'll marvel at the sky together.
I feel so young. I wear pink because it is pretty. I wear things that do not go together because I like the colors. I love to spin, and skip, and twirl around with my arms above my head. I like dancing with the boys and walking steep hills in the woods. I delight in mornings, but am too lazy to get out of bed. And when my mind is made up, it is made up.
----
I would like to bring you here. Set you loose and just let you be. I want to say, look here, isn't the sky so blue? I want to say, walk here, how do the stones feel under your feet? I want to say, listen, do you hear the geese? I want to say, can you hear the plane? Do you feel safe in these woods? and then link arms with you and we'll marvel at the sky together.
just words
i'm calling you out.
where are you?
where have you been?
i need you in this fight.
we need you.
my heart breaks for you.
i sit here in my bed for an hour.
an hour.
because i do not know how to answer you.
because i know you will take anything i say the wrong way.
but i must say something.
ache.
i want you to know you are loved.
You are sweeter than sleep.
P.S. IT IS GORGEOUS OUTSIDE!!! SQUEEE!!! :D
1/5/12
Resolute
i thought resolutions were dumb. they never worked. then i thought, why not try? why not give myself some grace for last year and start some new things? why not try. and then in church on sunday, in korea, the pastor preached about good resolutions. philippians 4:8- finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things. and then the book i was reading, radical, had five things to do for a year. pray for the entire world, read through the entire Word, commit my life to a multiplying community, sacrifice money for a purpose, give time in another context. so i made some resolutions for this year.
i want to be generous.
i want to live my life with joy.
i want to be more graceful in the way i relate to people.
and i want to do the five things from the radical experiment.
i'm working on making an actual plan, so i actually do these things.
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