yay us!

yay blogging!

hi friends!

now that people will actually read it I can write fun things :D hehe

Cherry flavoring is gross.

mostly.

donuts should NOT be cinnamon and cherry mixed.

GROSS.

Also my sister is now a master.

That's not all the news for today but it's the good news.

You probably have heard about the aid workers killed in Afghanistan. My parents knew the leader. It hits sort of close. People are not statistics when you are connected to them. When a few months ago you got a letter from them.

Well.

Goodnight.

I'm older than you buddy. You just listen to me. You don't know what you're getting into. We were never told it would be easy.

I'm invested. I spent a lot of time talking with you. I thought we were friends.

HMM. Buddy.

Who are you?

I thought you needed me.

You know what?

I needed you.

hush hush girl stuff

"You have cramps? Oh, just go run a mile. That'll help!"

Ummm yeah. That'll feel really good.

I've come to the conclusion that if you're not prepared, your period will come more on time than if you are prepared. At least, that always works for me.

Why is it so hush hush? Why can't I say, "Hey World, can you cut me some slack today? My insides ache." It's just a natural thing that happens to my body. Is it hush hush because it's slightly gross? It is gross, but I don't see how pretending like I don't hurt when I do helps so much. I think so many problems could be avoided if we just talked about it. "Hey can't come out today, I'm having cramps." Or more often in my case, a headache. That's so much easier than making up some lame excuse. It's not fair, that I have to pretend I feel just ducky, when in reality I feel like I'm exploding.

Or in school. Either the teacher figures it out and asks you about it in front of the class, or you get that, "I'm going to pass out right now if I don't get out of here" feeling and you have to half whisper it to them at the front of the room when the whole class is quietly working and can therefore hear you. And we're trained to be embarrassed.

I'm not saying it needs to become dinner conversation, but I would feel a lot better if the world wasn't embarrassed for me or didn't try to hide the fact that I am a girl, and girls have this... thing. It would be nice if instead of forcing me to pretend I feel great!, people would just realize that I'm trying my best, but I've got to take it a little more easy today. It would be nice. If people wouldn't be embarrassed. If people wouldn't keep it so hush hush. If people didn't run down the "feminine needs" isle at the grocery store. If I didn't feel like I have to hide my pads when I'm buying them at the store. If If If.

It always hurts to realize I'm not as important to someone as they are to me.

oh

well

You know what?

I love Psychology! (Which is good, cause it's my major.)

But I wavered for awhile, because sometimes people get this weird look on their face when I tell them what my major is. Or they give me a fake smile and say "great." Or maybe I'm just imagining it. Maybe I'm just imagining their disdain and my immediate response, "well you never know what'll happen. A lot of people change majors anyway." But either way, imaginative or not, I'm keeping it because I love it. I almost switched. I was dead set on switching to English. But I don't like taking English classes. So there. I love studying the brain.

goodnight. :)

I LOVE MY FRIENDS.

We go for walks, have cookouts and picnics, eat cookie dough while sitting on the kitchen floor, play in the river... oh it is just marvelous!